When we are being too hard on ourselves, negativity will build-up there and it further causes more stress and problems. We need to learn to express our emotions and feelings openly, need an emotional release not to hide or pretend everytime tht everything is fine. In fact, we need a cry as it releases pain we are going through. According to Roger Baker, Professor of Clinical Psychology at Bournemouth University and author of Emotional Processing: Healing Through Feeling:
“Crying does help us process faster than if we don’t cry at all, but it’s not the only thing — it’s part of a package of expressing it. If your father died, your natural reaction would be to cry. You wouldn’t be able to get it out of your mind, you’d be discussing it a great deal, and you couldn’t work or do anything initially.
But gradually, the turmoil would subside. You’d reach a point where you could look at photos, and although you’d remember him, there would be no powerful emotional reaction.
At that point, you could say it has been emotionally processed. But it’s not the passing of time that does that — it’s all the things you’ve done in between to help you to process it.”
Dr. Judith Orloff maintains:
“Crying makes us feel better, even when a problem persists. In addition to physical detoxification, emotional tears heal the heart. You don’t want to hold tears back.
Try to let go of outmoded, untrue, conceptions about crying. It is good to cry. It is healthy to cry. This helps to emotionally clear sadness and stress. Crying is also essential to resolve grief when waves of tears periodically come over us after we experience a loss.
Tears help us process the loss so we can keep living with open hearts. Otherwise, we are set up for depression if we suppress these potent feelings.”
Empower yourself and set boundaries as Self love is foundation and is key for mental health and wellbeing not selfishness,set and have high regard of yourself not to sacrifice yourself for others or to please others.To love yourself as a whole is to accept yourself and it creates a positive attitude towards life .self love is to appreciate ones ownself,protect and forgive yourself.Kabir Das,15th century poet and saint,explains this concept beautifully:
When a drop merges into the ocean, everyone understands it
But when the ocean merges into the drop, seldom does one understand it.
This explains we are not the part of the consciousness supreme but we are the consciousness supreme.
Why dont we love ourself??
why we end up with thoughts of ending our life??
why we are getting affected by others ??
why we allow them to affect our pusche ??
World population is increasing day by day and is counting in billions. We are one among this number of lakhs of population of our State. Let’s think among the population of State we are born in such a family who put their efforts to such a verge where we have been raised in such a sophisticated life. We have been provided what we need time by time’. We have a good value and specific image in our family and in environment. We are a part of our territory, our family, our siblings, our friends, our own nature. our presence in this world is a support for someone. Our smiling face is the cure for someone’s pain. Our communication is the healing of wounds of our close one. Our own body needs us much more than others. Ending of life means to close all these doors. We may end up our own life with in seconds but it marks a big hole in the heart of those who cares and loves us.We are living in era where people carray dead heart in their live bodies so to love oneself must be our first priorty .value yourself,adore yourself,have fun with yourself,recognise and respect yourself and accept your imperfections,celebrating yourself of being you,have deep loving connection with You.
One who will know how to love oneself will never end up with losing his/her life with in seconds. We
may think it will help us to relieve the pain but it is not such, it makes the situation more difficult and leads us to disaster for others who have put their whole life and hope on us. So we should think of hope of our loved ones and start thinking of self love and maintain balance between problem and solutions.
The views and opinions expressed by the writer are personal and do not necessarily reflect the official position of VOM.
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